His Goodbye
by The.Squint
Summary: Just another brokenhearted Leddie Fan venting through fiction... Alone and reminiscing Luc decides to call Eddie and say what was never said.


**Just another broken hearted Leddie fan.**

**After watching her final episode I just had to write something and here it is.**

**I am still holding out hope that something like this can happen, but if not I'm just going to pretend it did…**

**I really hope you enjoy it. **

She was gone. She was right to go and he was right to let her go as he did. Now he could be safe in the knowledge that he had done right by her in the end.

Yet as he lay still on his camp bad wrapped up in the sheets searching for that last scent of hers, he found that didn't seem to matter as much as it should. Logically he understood that he should gain some comfort in the knowledge that he had helped her, saved her maybe, but he had gone past the stage of logic long ago and now all he wanted was to have her here with him once more.

Images of her haunted him at everything turn. His lab, once a place where he could seek solitude, now just full of memories of her, from their first kiss to the final straw as she lay trembling on the metal gurney, her body rippling from Coamoxidon. Her ghost floating through every room on AAU and worst of all was what he felt as he lay here. So much had happened here. They had made love here and it was in those moments where he had felt true happiness, as she lay in his arms, her body tangled in his.

His stomach contracted at the thought. His heart ached.

Perhaps worst of all was that he could blame no one but himself. He had left her, allowing her to become involved with Max and vulnerable as she was and without him there to protect her, she had been manipulated into caring for that man who had taken advantage of her and left her in pieces. Though he returned immediately upon hearing Sacha's message, it became apparent fairly quickly that he was too late; she was the broken shell of what she had been when he had left her and the blame lay solely with him. How he had tried to fix her, to put her pieces back together, he had even kidnapped her and stripped her down to the core until she could fight him no longer, but even that wasn't enough.

He thought that they could do it, that he could pull her back from the brink of destruction. Reality had other plans.

If only he'd stayed. She would be there with him now and he knew it. This parallel life tormenting him so and if he could have one wish he'd wish not for world peace or stop world hunger, but it would be to have stayed with her, to have never left her.

But he _had_ left her and he couldn't take it back or wish it away and it would have to be something that he would live with for the rest of his life. Yet, despite it all at the end she had forgiven him for everything, he didn't deserve her, he had disappointed her every step of the way and yet she had loved him anyway and forgiven all his sins.

They'd never really said it to each other, he had never felt the need to as he was sure that it was known and shared equally between them; love. Still, he should have told her, he knew that she would have already known, but that didn't change the fact that he regretted his decision to never speak the words. She deserved to know, as he knew that it was something that she had felt very little of in her life. It wouldn't even matter to him if she didn't return the words, he just wanted her to know, why had he never told her…

He thought about their last moment together in the car park, how he had begged for her to stay and she had spoken so sweetly to him, explaining that she couldn't do this with him. He had done all he could and she thanked him smiling as she did so before finally she kissed him goodbye.

Just when he was prepared to give himself wholly to her, she had to leave him, with no intention of returning.

Some may wonder why he didn't throw himself in front of that small red car as it began to pull away and take her from him for good and it was because he knew in that moment that she was right; he was toxic to her whilst she was his nectar and if he wanted to help her now then he needed to let her go. Which he did. He had finally done right by her. He had saved her.

However, there was one final thing he needed to do, something that needed to be said. His hand searched deep in his pocket before locating his mobile and after a moment's hesitation he made the connection and placed the phone to his ear.

His heart pumped hard and fast, causing the blood to rush through his ears making it difficult to hear the ringing tone.

The ringing tone stopped.

She answered.

She had actually answered.

This would be the first time either of them had spoken to each other since that day; two months ago and part of him had expected her to ignore the call, knowing it would be too painful to answer.

"Luc?" Her voice small and nervous. His heart rate fastened, if that were even possible. Her voice. He had forgotten how sweet it was and it was everything he could do not to hang up the phone, knowing what he had called to do. To say goodbye.

She had said her goodbyes, but he had not, he had not been ready. He was not ready now, but he knew that he must if he had any chance in surviving his life without her.

He had been silent for a while now with the words trembling at the edge of his tongue.

"Luc?" her voice shaking slightly, frighten of what he had called to say.

_It's time to say it. _He breathed deeply and opened his mouth to speak "I love you, that's all I wanted to say"

Silence greeted his confession. He hadn't expected any different and just as he was prepared to hang up the phone he heard her take a shaky breath.

She was crying and suddenly he wondered if he had made a mistake in telling her. Perhaps telling her this would only make her feel things that she would rather forget and if there was one thing Eddie and him shared in common, it was their unease with serious emotions.

He began to panic; he was miles from her now and yet still he found ways to hurt her. Just as he was preparing himself to apologise and disconnect, she appeared to have found her voice, shaking with tears though it was.

"I love you too Luc"

His panic eased as it was replaced with the most poignant happiness. The fact that a woman as wonderful as she was could even love him was amazing to him and to know that even though he could not have her physically, he could have her heart gave him some comfort.

He had only one more thing to ask.

"Tell me you're okay Eddie?"

Though hidden beneath his choice of vague words, she would know what he was really asking; had she beaten the demons that he couldn't defend her from?

"I'm okay, because of you. Thank you"

He felt as if he could cry. She had done it; beaten the demons that had once threatened to tear down her entire world as she knew it and he was so proud of her in that moment he could almost forget how much he missed her.

Despite the few words spoken between them he knew that nothing more needed to be said and knew that if he were to continue the conversation it would be unfair to them both. Her voice was enough to cause his heart to ache and the longer he allowed himself to hear it, the harder it would be to let go and so he knew he must end it, this brief relapse back on each other they had shared.

It was time to say goodbye. His goodbye.

He knew he must, and yet every fibre of his being was willing him to say something else, anything else. He opened his mouth and breathed deeply, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill.

"Goodbye Eddie"

"Goodbye Luc"

And with that she was gone. Silence surrounded him to the point where it was nearly deafening.

He felt empty, that was perhaps the only was he could describe it. He had given everything he had to her and now he was with nothing. Yet strangely, despite everything he felt a smile pull apart his lips all because he knew that she was back to herself once more and she believed that he was the reason. The smile wouldn't last, he knew that, but the knowledge that she was happy and strong would certainly see through his difficult days ahead.

He closed his eyes and recalled her sweet voice _"I love you too Luc" _it warmed his heart whilst causing it to ache. He knew that was perhaps the last time he would ever speak to her and hear her voice again, but what amazing words to end with and of all the ways to say goodbye, this by far had to be the best.

**There you have it. I would love to know what you thought; please R&R if you would be so kind. Thank you for reading and I very much hope you enjoyed it.**


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